Let me start by saying I have known since I was 13 that havin' babies was not going to be an easy thing for me to do. For a long time, it didn't bother me. I was living life as a college student, a graduate student, and then a teacher. My now-fiancée and I were just starting a relationship and I didn't have babies on the brain.
Fast-forward to two days ago. My good friend tells me she's pregnant for the 2nd time in 3 years. Both pregnancies happened the first time they tried. Oh the pain. We are getting married soon and want to start a family, so I have been thinking about that whole "broken uterus" thing a lot lately.
I so desperately want to be happy for them, but my own selfishness gets in the way. I know i'm not alone in this, but boy does it feel sucky.